Here we are almost two months into the New Year and what has changed in your marriage? All those changes you spoke of and promised have been lost in the daily thing we call life. Let’s go on the premise we all want more than just an ordinary marriage. I think that is a safe thought. Unfortunately, our marriages have become like a well-worn pair of shoes, comfortable.
Every once in a while you clean them and they look like new… No I don’t think so. Sure some of you might have an extraordinary marriage. But the vast majority of marriages suffer from mediocrity. I am not trying to be harsh, just honest.
So we see that some work might need to be done… We have to ask ourselves do we want more for our marriage. If the answer is yes, let the journey begin to discover an Unprecedented Marriage.
Any relationship that is looking to be unprecedented must start with a committed relationship with Jesus Christ. If He is not the focal point of our marriages then what is it built on? Remember you are responsible for your Christian walk not your spouse… Start today by falling in love with the One who rescued you. That is an awesome first step! Getting your spiritual house in order will open up so many different opportunities for God to move in your marriage.
Just as you are learning to fall in love with Jesus, start the daily process of falling in love with your spouse. The love you have for each other is a daily choice, right? I am not saying it is easy. When did Jesus call us to the easy way? He called us to the right way. Most of us have read what Paul wrote in Ephesians 5:22-33. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body. F OR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:22-33 NASB)
I believe there are couple key verses that will propel our marriages to be Unprecedented.
Men it is my firm belief that it is our responsibility to guide our marriages. It is an awesome task but even a greater privilege. We will start with verse 25.
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and give Himself up for her.”
Many of you know my shoe addiction, there is not one pair I would die for. When you gaze upon your bride is it with thoughts being comfortable like a well-worn pair of shoes or perhaps like new shoes some stretching has to take place? Whatever your thoughts on the condition of your marriage men… Are you willing to die for your bride as Christ died for His bride the church? WOW that is a heavy question!! Take a few moments to think about it? Are you willing to lay your life down for your bride? It may not be a physical death but spiritually are you willing to die to self and put your bride’s needs before your own? That one question answered yes is a huge piece in having an Unprecedented Marriage. It is the catalyst of falling in love again.
Ladies I bet you’re wondering… Will he go to that one verse that causes the hair to stand up on the back of my neck? Your answer is yes…
Verse 22… “Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the lord.”
You have had time to roll your eyes. First try to understand… This is not a position of weakness. It is a position of strength and respect. “Subject” in any language, does not mean “doormat.” You play a critical role in making your marriage Unprecedented. It is a partnership not a dictatorship. You are held in high esteem and it is critical in keeping order in your marriage. I just read this quote from Maya Angelou, “A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man would have to seek out Jesus to find it.” Ponder that for a moment.
The bow for these two verses is found in verse 33; “Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.”
What I see in scripture, marriages are built first on a love found only in Jesus. As that is foundational, a mutual love for one another builds and grows. Start practicing today falling in love with each other. Those comfortable shoes donate them. Time to make our marriages alive and fresh. Worn out shoes stink. In 2015 no stinky marriages.
Allow Jesus to walk into your marriage and you will experience an Unprecedented Marriage.
Song of Solomon 6:3 says… “I am my beloved’s and beloved’s is mine,” Verse 7:10 says… “I am my beloved’s, And his desire is for me.”
Our prayer is that you desire an Unprecedented Marriage!
Pastor Scott & Shannon White